birds in May

we've had a few new birds around...or I've finally gotten semi decent pics..

scarlet tanager couple

black-billed cuckoo

Sooo this happened.

I'm alive. Birding a TON.
I WILL BE BACK!
Really. It's spring (aside from 23 degrees and snow right now).. Gardening to share!
Miss you all!

I finally saw an osprey. And the jerk does THIS on camera. Only me. *eyeroll*

Decorating with a nature theme..

Maybe I took it too far this year?
(check the *ornament* in the center of the wreath)

Thank you, little Carolina Wren. That made my day :)

Blog babble

Browsing my blog stats this morning, I find the search terms that are sending people to my blog:

Chaos (obvious), dog chaos (ok, again), sharpest thing on earth (!?), guard crows, and baby garter snakes, The most confusing one "making marriage work"

When the HELL do I blog about that? 

No offense, babe. You know I adore you to the core of your being, but what I know about MAKING this work can be written on a TicTac.  I'm just winging it. ;)

The "guard crows" amuses me greatly.  We do have a murder of crows that hang out close to home, and beg for table scraps. Crows chase hawks/owls, hawks/owls eat songbirds.  They are hired help.

But.....do other people do this? Why are people looking for guard crows???

The guard crows, having dinner with the deer.  The crow has..pizza.  

Crows love caaaarbs.

Speaking of bloggy things...

Check out the Links I Love tab, please. Shop, read, learn, shop some more. 

Why I relate to deer

Loving mother is beating on her "teenager"... over food.

I totally get that.
Which is why my childless state is a Good Thing.

"You ladies are hardcore about the food thing"

Primitive Brain vs Thinking Brain..again

I woke up this morning and staggered into the kitchen for coffee, pushing my bangs out of my eyes.
I felt a hard, oval object on top of my head.

Stupid hair clip..must have forgotten to take it out.

Wait. I don't wear hair clips...barrettes..
Then it moved.

(for those of you that know me, you know I have a long history of overreacting with violence and panic. On the flip side, I have a long history of having freakishly large bugs/spiders ON MY HEAD)

Thinking Brain: Go look in the mirror before you freak out, assuming it's some giant man-eating insect.
Primitive Brain: OMG ITS A GIANT MAN EATING BUG! KILL IT WITH FIRE! GET THE CLEAVER!

So, I calmly walked (at high speed) to a mirror and discovered I DID in fact have an enormous beetle perched on my head.

Thinking Brain: Ok, do not panic and smash this thing in your hair. Calmly remove it. See if you can flick it off.
Primitive Brain: FIRE! CLEAVER! LAWN MOWER!!!

GiantBugOfSatan was not moving, and clung desperately to my curls
(curls meaning- bedhead that looks more like shrubbery than hair)
The more I messed with GBoS, the angrier he got, and started wildly waving his antennae.

Michael wakes up to find me spinning in a circle, flapping my hands at my head, bent over at the waist.  I may have been making a high pitched yodeling noise.
GBoS became extremely frightened at some point ("this tree has gone freaking insane!"), because he dove off my head and hauled ass across the kitchen.

He's still lurking in there somewhere.
God help me.

This works, in case God is busy elsewhere:

Hoodies..and why I need a kayak and/or more camera equipment

No.  Not my normal attire.  BIRD type hoodies!

Yes, I know. Blur city. YOU try hanging out of a car window while sleety snow pelts your face and you're busy fighting with your beloved on WHY you need a 500mm lens because the f@#%ing birds won't come closer...
Anyway.

HOODIES! A herd of hooded mergansers! WOO!

Don't you think I should have a kayak...in addition to a 500mm lens?
Nothing could possibly go wrong with ME in a kayak, carrying a 500mm lens.
At all.

Michael tried (and succeeded) using my comments against me.
"You aren't a photographer, you said. You said you're someone who happens to have a camera. Why would you invest that much in a lens, if that's the case?"
"You laughed when I mentioned kayaks a few years ago. You brought up about 10 ways you would kill yourself with a kayak. So..what's changed?"
BECAUSE I SAID SO.


I know. Should have worked on that argument.

Gender roles/arachnids/bad for you/Pig

My two big, burly garbage men complained about the weight of my trash. (!?)
I'm not throwing away concrete block, people.  It's regular old household trash.

I asked if they needed my help lifting it into the truck, since I'm the one that carried it all the way down to the road.
"Oh, we figured your husband did." (!!??)
Sigh...and who says that?
"No, he was washing dishes when I took the trash out.  We have our gender roles confused."
I think I confused them, as both of them glanced at my chest.


We've had a ton of gorgeous spiders this year.
Please note: my spider photography sucks.  Most often, I'm in some crazy position trying to avoid webs!

I know a lot of you are ready to slap me for giant spider shots, but I love me some arachnids.
They kill stinkbugs.  They can do no wrong.
Plus, they scare the shit out of Michael...and it's just plain funny when my 6'2 husband runs.. screaming.

  I made a few dishes to freeze..snacky, side-dishy things.
Of course, I had to taste test.

Mushrooms with bourbon cured bacon and a little brown sugar.
I'm not a huge bacon fan DON'T HURT ME!, but these...I could eat my weight in these.  They didn't make it to the freezer.  After we ate a portion with dinner, well, there was no point in freezing the measly amount left.  Waste of freezer space!  I'll make another batch to freeze.  And I won't devour them like some shroom crazed beast. This time.

Michael is a fan of jalapeno poppers.  I am not.
They are tasteless blobs of deep fried nothing-but-hot.  
Unless...you use seasoned panko and a special blend of cheeses and perfectly ripe peppers from the garden.
I even bake the suckers, so we don't have DEEP FRIED SIN..
I'm all about deep fried goodies.  That part is more for people that worry about their arteries.  Unlike me.  Apparently.  Mmm.  Deep fried swiss cheese.  When the hell is the county fair?! 

They are absolutely delicious, except when I got my peppers confused and made some with Michael's OMGWTF peppers.  I have no idea what type they are, except they are yellowish and contain enough heat to make the sun sweat blood.  After I put out my face-fire, they were quite tasty.
Michael LOVES them and declares all other poppers "a waste of time".  How can I refuse to make giant batches of these stupid things?

___________
PIG UPDATE:
For those that asked, Pig is gone.  Or in witness protection. Or at Fat Camp.
I fear she's gone to the Great Bakery in the Sky.
We had one incident with a Pig-that-maybe-wasn't...and that ghog hasn't been back.

I miss her, kind of.
I do not miss her breaking and entering, harassing me, harassing the dogs, eating my yard, etc.
It was kind of nice not to worry every single time I let the dogs out.
   Wherever she is, I hope she is fat and happy and full of caaaaaaaaaaaarbs.

Chaos, part 239572

Another post that is ALL over the damned place...

This summer was supposed to be our lazy summer.
HA!

Lots of laying poolside and reading.
HA!

Instead, we had days of "Whoa. The bathroom floor feels weird next to the shower.."
and "Sam...Honey, WTF happened to the bathroom floor? Where IS it?"

Michael came home to a bathroom missing a floor..down to the joists.
I need to mention we don't have central air, and it was roughly 198 degrees with 613% humidity the day I tackled the bathroom floor.
Made me cranky.
More cranky.

Then we had a day of replacing the kitchen ceiling...another 198% day with 613% humidity.
Cranky doesn't begin to cover it.

Home repair certainly tests the strength of your relationship.  If we ended the work day and DIDN'T want to take a 12 pound sledge to each other...it was a good day.

Things have been absolutely chaotic this summer.
Beyond my norm! What the hell!?

We decided we need to focus on a hobby together..we hike/camp/etc together, but we needed a quickie hobby..something we could hop in the car and spend an hour doing.

I used to LOVE shooting. The gun range (or the gun range at my uncle J's house) was Good Times.
Good SAFE times..we're crazy, but good crazy..not dangerous crazy.
Hell, we're not even worrisome crazy.

So. Research and trips to Cabela's and the local gun shop...and we're back on the range.
MAN, did I miss it!

*Michael wins the Awesome Husband Award for being completely supportive and encouraging, taking advice from A GIRL, and being proud of my skill instead of crappy that I'm currently a better shot than him.

We have a state game lands range about 5 minutes away...
We can hop in the car and spend some quality time doing something we love.  Plus, we're meeting some great folks at the range.

We pull off the road and watch the wildlife around the creek...chat...watch sunrise or sunset...

hanging out by the gun range..she knows she's safe there! smartass deer.

Backyard, Oct 17

Looking out the east kitchen window-

The birds are enjoying those bird cakes a little TOO much...

I can see myself making bird cakes and neglecting my own cooking.

Everyone's a freaking food critic nowadays....

200..

posts!  For me? A miracle.  I get distracted by projects, books, the weather.
Pretty much everything.
This is post 201 and I meant to mention post 200 on that post.  See what I mean?

I should have a giveaway when I reach a bigger number.
  I can give away..hmm..some deer?  The Chaos Dogs?  Michael?
Pig!  I'll giveaway Pig!

It's been a full week since we've seen Pig.  I'm guessing she's gone for the winter.
I checked photos from last year and she vanished in early October.
We haven't seen any signs of a dead animal around (not being morbid, it's just nature) so..
Goodnight, Pig!
I saved this image for her official Fall Retirement.

I have amazing aim, huh?
Don't ask how many flowers were tossed (and eaten) before I landed one.
The key to this is breaking all of the stem off and making sure the back of the daisy is as flat as possible.  Just in case you want to try this at home (yeah, don't do that).

Michael's alarm went off at 4 am.
Voodoo expresses our feelings exactly:

Enjoy your day!
Take a nap for us...

GRR..but...

Vile human being.
Destroying A nest..ONE nest..is bad enough.
"1,458 nests and 2,400 eggs and chicks had been destroyed. Only one chick was still alive."
I have faith this scumbag's personal Hell will be filled with extremely pissed off birds.
----
NOW.
Moving on, because I refuse to allow this to upset me for the rest of the day..week..month..
We had a stunning morning..the fog and sunlight..just gorgeous.

Aside from the getting the pee scared out of me...

Ok, that was kinda low.  Scared me and the birds!

It was a perfect morning.

Part of our woods..

The five of us tromped around in the woods for a bit, then worked in the back yard.
Well, I worked.
The dogs did dog stuff.

"Bird!  BIRD!"

 Yes, Voodoo..there are birds at the bird feeder.

Strider and Henry, with Voo pointing...mushrooms...in the background.
Mushrooms.
His ancestors laugh.

 Voodoo doesn't eat mushrooms, but I dispose of the ones he finds. Why tempt fate?

Shortly after her Majestic Akita shot, Irie got her head stuck in a bucket.

I also stubbed my toes into one of those @#$%s.  That'll teach me to wear flipflops during chestnut season!
Once my toes stop throbbing, we're heading back out to the woods.

Maybe we can all do something kind for wildlife this weekend, to help make up for the *shortcomings* of some of our species.

Babble

Important stuff:

Another reason hockey rocks.

While I most certainly appreciate all the breast cancer funding and raising awareness (having boobs and all)...
I also have a pancreas..lymph nodes..bone marrow..blood..
There's a prostate in the house.
The NHL spreads the love ($ and awareness) to more than one type of cancer.
It's needed.
We all have a million parts that could be affected by cancer.
Funding/research/awareness/patient resources needs to cover all those parts.
Definitely not saying breast cancer is more/less important, just that all cancers are equally important.

Crazy stuff:
I nearly died drinking coffee this AM while looking at Halloween decorations..which led me to costumes.
Sexy?
Sexy??
AHAHAHAHA
and
BWAHAHAHA

Seriously, I inhaled scalding hot coffee and nearly boiled my lungs.
I'm still coughing 3 hours later.

Nothing says sexy like a poo flinging primate.
I think one of our dog beds is made out of the same thing as Sexy Rudolph's dress.
I just sent Michael photos of those two costumes and received this in reply:
"that is ridiculous. not sexy."
No wonder we're married.

I don't get sexy Halloween.
I dig scary Halloween.
Unless flesh eating zombies are sexy...
and then I think you have a whole 'nother set of problems.




I won't leave you with THAT particular image in your head..
you're welcome:

To camp or not to camp..

That is the question.

So, Michael's workplace (as a further example of WTF are they DOING) realized Person X was back from paternity leave in time to cover this weekend.
YAY! Camping!
Of course the weather forecast changed..the camping gods like to mess with my head.
  Instead of 65 and sunny both days, we have 50-53 during the day and mid 30s at night.. and a 30% chance of showers.
Now, we camped 2 weeks ago with a 30% chance and nothin'. Cloudy and chilly but gorgeous.
Last year's Camp Hell was a 30% chance of rain.  We nearly drowned IN the tent.

Does it make me an Outdoor Pansy Ass if I don't want to get rained on and freeze my buns off?
I tease one of my friends about being an Outdoor Pansy Ass..she hates Outside unless it's a certain temp/humidity/cloud coverage.
Heathypooh, I love you..but you know you're an OPA.


No Pig again today..but the deer were out in force.  I missed both the big buck and the little fellow I posted a few days ago.
I did grab a quick shot of Mom and Triplets.

*sniffle*  No more spots!

Birders!

For the HOURS of driving/walking around the upper Ohio Valley, Presque Isle state park in Erie PA, etc..
 I have never seen a freaking warbler..ANY warbler..

Michael's big joke is to yell "Warbler!" if we spot a common bird.

Today, I'm reading on the couch and hear unfamiliar birdsong.
I see a yellowish thing flitting through the trees.  What the heck is that....?
NEW BIRD!
With my normal grace under pressure, I flail wildly and leap off the couch, stumble through the house and snag my camera.
More grace? I smacked the camera off the window and into my brow bone.
I know.


But but...LOOK!

So..what's your vote?

Just a few

grainy, dark photos...and we're out the door!
Errand day (BLAH!), mowing day (if the rain holds off), and hiking this evening (see previous rain comment).


In my photographic defense, it was drizzling and almost dark.


Everyone is loading up on sunflower seeds...

..and whatever apples Pig doesn't eat!

We can hike for hours and not see deer or wild turkeys, and very few birds..
cracks me up that all I have to do is open the front door!

Enjoy your day!

It's official..

I need therapy.
Or a hobby.
Or winter to get here so Pig hibernates.


Yesterday morning I wandered outside with a camera, a scale and the crow/Pig scraps.
I stood on the giant rock in the yard, well out of Pig's reach, and placed the scale where I thought she would stand.
Pig spotted the bowl and stepped right onto the scale.
(The crows also spotted the bowl and were screaming obscenities from the treetops.)

That went a little easier than I expected!

11 pounds, 2 ounces..roughly.
Average groundhog weight is between 7 and 11 pounds, so sayeth The Google.

She started reaching for my toes...

So I tossed her a leftover tortilla.

My kinda gal...snarfing down carbs while standing on a scale.

"WHAT!?  11 pounds?!"

"I hate dieting."

I got.
A groundhog.
On a scale.
Shouldn't there be some kind of award or prize for this?


This led to me violently cleaning my scale (no offense, Pig, but you are a Wild Thing).
Michael wandered in and asked what I was doing.
"Cleaning the scale..Pig was on it."

He eyeballed me and left the room, muttering something about "crazy"....
If Pig doesn't hibernate soon, God knows what will be next.