Tuesday, August 23

Ranting...and OMG Earthquake!?

1.  Electric company scheduled power outage.  From 7am to 1pm.
And tells no one.  I had to hear it from the lady at the tiny post office, who heard it from her boyfriend..his neighbors works for electric co.
2:45 rolls around, I call and ask when the scheduled outage was going to end.
"Miss, we know this is an outage.  It's scheduled."
Am I suddenly speaking in a foreign language? 
I want to know what the estimate is, since 1pm has come and gone.
"Miss, we don't like to give estimates...it disappoints our customers if we don't meet the time."
OMG don't get me started on disappointment in your company, Tiffany.  Your company tried to tell me the reason my power flips off every morning at 7 exactly...was squirrels.

2.  Sprint cell service.
I got yelled at for asking them why I was having service problems..
"There was an EARTHQUAKE, you realize? This caused a Mass Calling Event.  Did you not see the news?"
Did you seriously drop attitude on me, little man? 
Noooo. I didn't see the news because I don't have electricity and my phone isn't working.  It took us mountain folk a while to confirm it was an earth-freaking-quake and I've never experienced a mass calling event before..and your POS website is down so I couldn't check the FAQs or forums.  Don't piss with me today.


3. Jackass fishing without a license while we're hiking this AM.
"Hey guys!  Good spot, huh? Hope no dumb @#$% game warden comes by..haw haw!"
You have 1 minute to empty that bucket and reel in that line, or I'm calling the police.  And game wardens. And park rangers.  THEN I'm "accidentally" letting my dogs loose.
"Bitch!"

Did you know...dogs trained to bark maniacally when you say "SIC BALLS!" will give regular men warp speed?
It's true.
My dogs also know "Neuter!" means to bark like maniacs.
It's epic.  I promise I'll get video.
My dogs have NO idea what sic balls means..they aren't attack dogs.  I just used creative training words.

4. Earthquake.
OMG. WTF.
WTFingF.
I'm sitting on the bar stool in the kitchen, munching my sandwich, when the house twitches like a cat's tail...and then continues to writhe for 10 seconds or so.
"Michael! What the hell was THAT!?"
"Could that have been an earthquake!?"
"Honey, in WV? Really???"

Famous last words.


Hope everyone in Blogland is ok and has gotten in touch with friends and family...that was some craziness.

21 comments:

  1. Oh my...you poor dear with the day you had! I'm glad you're ok and hope you get a good night's sleep. Tomorrow is a new day. :)

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  2. once again, your day makes mine look like absolute milktoast. :) i like my quiet, non-eventful, non-attack-dog, a/c running in the god-awful heat, day... :)

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  3. I love quiet days where nothing crazy happens!
    I remember those days..that day..ok, that one time ;)

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  4. Whew! It's fun living in West Virginia isn't it! lol It has been awhile since they've done a scheduled power outage where I live but when they do do it I have no idea it is going to happen either. My husband complained about the cell phone outage. I didn't know anything about that one because I don't have a real cell phone because they don't work at my house. I have a pay as you go just in case of emergencies when I'm out.

    I did feel some tremors from what I thought was a mild earthquake but it was way earlier than the big one! lol

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  5. Good for you for speaking up against the fisherman (poacher). I'll bet he'll think twice next time.

    Glad you're OK after the quake.

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  6. Glad you guys are okay and I have to say this post totally cracked me up! lol

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  7. O!M!G!!

    I am glad you are doing ok. I now know what some new training words for my next dog are...

    And I assume your power is back on since you blogged. I am sorry you had trouble. One place we lived for a bit, was OPAL power. We referred to it as "Occasional Power And Light". (More or less deservedly so...)

    Cat

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  8. Glad everyone made it through the Quake ok, that was really... interesting. The pots hanging from my pot rack were actually clanking together! I hate being without electricity, hope everything is back to normal today:@)

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  9. Today has GOT to better for you! We made it through with just shaking...:)JP

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  10. Right on!

    I know it wasn't funny to you, but your comments made me smile. I feel exactly the same way on some days but you said it so much better!

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  11. Sounds like there is never a dull moment in WV ! Love your state by the way. Used to whitewater raft on the New, Cheat and Gauley Rivers. Thanks for visiting my photo blog. I enjoy your Photos and observations in your blog. Thanks, Keith

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  12. I really thought it was wind gusts at first. Then I looked outside and the leaves were still on the trees. And it got more intense and then the pictures were rattling on the wall - I realized then what it was!

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  13. That's some day you've had there, Sam.

    Better take a snap of that SOB fishing without a license and dob him in...

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  14. "Sic balls".....come here, Buddy we've got something new to learn MWAHAHAHAHAHA!

    Don't get me started on the power company especially if you're talking about AEP. They've requested 14 rate increases since we moved here 7 years ago and try to convince me my bill has only gone up 22% even though my budget billing payment has increased 121%. I do know how to run a calculator and got the billing history from THEIR WEB SITE! I ain't just mountain folk, I'm an ignorant redneck with an engineering degree!

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  15. It's the squirrels, man! The SQUIRRELS are screwing up your electric usage.
    If my squirrels can cause my power to go out at 7am, Monday through Friday..........

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  16. here's hopin' for a better day tomorrow...
    yeow! sic balls makes me cringe and i don't even have any...
    i wonder if these east coast quakes are gonna be a regular thing...
    i used to ride them out when i lived in CA...at least this one didn't cause major damage...
    weird weather all over this year...

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  17. Oh, girl you do make me laugh!

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  18. GIRL, I hear you with the crazy days! I think you win this round, though!

    P.S. Definitely do post the sic balls video!

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  19. That was an awesome rant. Love the story of the fishing jerk. I once said something like "sic balls" to my dog when a guy flashed me on a trail. My dog sprinted straight at him snarling. He pulled up his pants and ran away. I called my dog off (she didn't actually know what I was telling her to do but she picked up bad vibes from the guy).

    Glad you're ok despite the mass calling event!

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  20. GIRL! One...yes, I am late and wrong catching up on my blog reading...and two, we had that damn earthquake too! We never had one in Delaware before and I was sitting at my desk yelling at my employee to get the hell off my desk and quit shoving it...talk about feaking out. I had 8 employees standing between two rows of stack metal 18' tall. All I could picture was mass decapitation!

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